DAYTON, Ohio — Dale Pruitt-Nowakowski, 54, became the first American in recorded history to read a user agreement to its conclusion Tuesday, and immediately learned that he has been legally married to three streaming services since the spring of 2021.

The discovery came at Section 94(c) of the Streamlark Terms of Service, which states that “continued viewing beyond the third consecutive episode constitutes a binding exchange of vows.” Pruitt-Nowakowski then checked the agreements for Reelio+ and Binge&Co., where he found nearly identical language, plus a clause naming Binge&Co. as “the spouse of greater seniority.”

“I just wanted to know if I could cancel the free trial,” said Pruitt-Nowakowski, speaking from his kitchen table, where he has been seated since Sunday. “Now I’m in a throuple with a content library.”

Under the agreements, Pruitt-Nowakowski has pledged to “love, honor, and remain on the annual plan.” In the event of dissolution, he is entitled to half of each service’s catalog, provided he can locate it, and each service is entitled to his password, his viewing history, and “the emotional use of his likeness.”

Dr. Marguerite Anselbaum-Fretwell, Senior Fellow in Consent Fatigue at the Institute for Scrolling Past Things, said the findings were inevitable. “For decades, Americans have clicked ‘I Agree’ roughly nine million times apiece,” she said. “Statistically, most of us are married to something. Probably a weather app. Possibly a rental scooter.”

Representatives for the three services said they were “thrilled” to welcome Pruitt-Nowakowski into the family. They also noted that he had already consented to receive notifications about the union, as well as notifications about the notifications.

“I just wanted to know if I could cancel the free trial. Now I’m in a throuple with a content library.”

Pruitt-Nowakowski said the marriages have not been easy. Streamlark raised his monthly rate by $2 in March without discussing it, and Reelio+ has begun asking, every evening at 9 p.m., whether he is “still watching.” He described the question as “fair, but pointed.”

Binge&Co. has been more difficult still. Section 61 of its agreement contains a prenuptial arbitration clause requiring all disputes to be settled by a panel of three binge-watchers selected by Binge&Co. When Pruitt-Nowakowski objected, the company reminded him that he had waived his right to object in Section 12, a clause he reports finding “very thorough.”

Attorney Lonnie Aldergast, an adjunct professor of Matrimonial Law and Auto-Renewal at the Cuyahoga Valley School of Technicalities, said the unions are airtight. “He ticked the box, and the box has been ticked,” Aldergast said. “Frankly, he got off easy. Page 212 of the Reelio+ agreement includes a custody arrangement for his future children’s recommended-for-you row.”

At press time, Pruitt-Nowakowski had reached the end of the Binge&Co. document and discovered a final clause stating that anyone who reads this far is entitled to one free month. He confirmed the month had already been applied to his wife’s account.